The elimination of small pricks

Gorse is flowering madly on the roadside verges and across unattended paddocks at the moment. Now considered a noxious weed, gorse was introduced by homesick Scottish immigrants cver 150 years ago to remind them of long-lost misty glens, but now all this prickly customer does is remind their descendents that it's time to stock up on Roundup.

Speaking of small obnoxious pricks, lately NieceT has had to deal with a cretinous 8 year-old playground bully by the name of Cedric, whose party trick is to trap girls and hold them down and kiss them, all the while being given ringside advice and encouragement by his cronies (Tristan and Kent) and no, I didn't pick out these names from a 1938 copy of "Chummy Chaps" magazine; these are their actual names.

Anyway, this rather disturbing behaviour was quickly stamped out by school staff, but unfortunately the revolting Cedric & co struck again yesterday lunchtime: this time they decided to start shoving round our 5 year-old neighbour Ben, who sports milk-bottle bottom glasses and tends to be on the weedy side of small.

In a Disney movie moment, this second round was swiftly nipped in the bud by the heroine on the spot, Niece T. "I took him out, Aunty Fi! I kicked Cedric and punched him one and grabbed Ben and ran away!" she informed me with a huge grin on her face.

Of course, one shouldn't "condone" violence, but I couldn't help replying "Good one T, good one."

Yep, some noxious weeds definitely require specialised removal.